CHAPTER ONE​

 

“Where the fuck you at? I been calling you all night.”

“Just chill. I’m handling business right now. What’s up?”

“I hope you got that money Rashaad let you hold. He said he want his shit back by tomorrow night.”

Shonnie already knew Rico didn’t have the money because her intuition was his biggest enemy. She was tired of covering for him and asking her cousin to lend him something to put him on his feet, only for Rico to lose it shooting dice or spend it showing off for hoes.

Ever since high school, Rico had been the love of her life, but he just couldn’t get it together. He was tall, dark, and handsome, with gold teeth and long locs that he wore in barrel twists or a messy bun, and according to Shonnie, he had the best dick she had ever tasted.

They started dating in 10th grade and had been on and off ever since. She loved him and wanted to build a stable future with him, but every time she got her hopes up, he always let her down.

“I’m rounding up the rest tonight,” he lied. “My nigga, Boom, got some plays in motion that’s gon’ get me the five grand I owe Rashaad, plus a lil’ extra. Shit, you might even be able to take some time off work—stop dancing for them dusty niggas at the club and start dancing for me.”

He made the lies sound like music to her ears. And not the strip club music she danced to almost every night, but real baby making, let's get married, Jagged Edge type shit. Shonnie wanted that kind of relationship so badly, and even though she knew deep down inside it wouldn’t happen with Rico, she still held onto him.

“I hope so. ‘Cause I sure am tired of being in this funky ass club every night. I might make good money here and everything, but I’m almost 30. I’m getting too old for this. I wanna settle down, think about having kids, get a real career, and I don’t wanna be in Chicago forever. It’s too dangerous out here to be trying to raise a family. And who the fuck is Boom?”

“Don’t worry ‘bout all that. Look, we gon’ be straight, baby. Just trust me, iight? No more bullshit, no more fucking up the work. I’ma finally be on for good and you gon’ have everything you ever wanted.”

Shonnie hesitated to get her hopes up again. Her gut nagged her to cut her losses and move on with her life, but when she thought about starting over with someone new, she always talked herself out of it.

“Ok, baby. I’m trusting you. I love you and I’ma let you get back to handling business. Vince getting ready to come through so I gotta be ready for him. You coming by the club tonight?”

Rico sucked his teeth. He couldn’t stand Shonnie’s relationship with Vince because he knew Vince wanted more than just private dances. On top of that, Vince was everything Rico wanted to be in the streets of Chicago. He had money, status, niggas who hated him and bitches who loved him—a true king when it came to running shit and securing them pipelines.

“Nah, not tonight,” he said. “I don’t know what time we gon’ finish out here, so I’ll see you when you get home.”

“Ok. Please be safe, Rico. I don’t wanna get no crazy ass phone calls about you.”

After their call, Rico sat in Boom’s passenger seat wondering how he was going to come up with five thousand dollars by the following night. He was also deep in thought about Shonnie and how she deserved a real, adult relationship. One where he took care of home and she didn’t have to shake ass for other niggas every night. He loved her and knew she deserved a better man than he was, but he had no idea how to be better.

“I don’t know why you keep lying to that girl,” Boom said. “One of these days, all this shit gon’ catch up to you. And I hope you don’t think I’ma be your lil’ secret for life, because unlike her, I know how to let a nigga go.”

“Shut the fuck up, Boom,” Rico hissed. “You gon’ be and do whatever I tell you to do. Now mind your damn business when it comes to Shonnie. I just gotta figure some shit out first.”

Boom was Rico’s behind the scenes play-thing. He was easy to handle and didn’t expect much from their interactions, other than sex whenever Rico was mad at the world and needed to release the pent up tension in his nuts.

Their fling was a different kind of thrill for both of them. One night, after a long night of partying and bullshit, Rico fell asleep at one of their mutual friends' houses and woke up to his dick in Boom’s mouth. But instead of freaking out and putting a bullet in Boom’s skull, he laid back down and enjoyed himself.

He felt disgusted when it was over and swore on everything he loved that he wasn’t gay, but after a few more sneaky links with his newfound best eater, he became unsure of himself.

“How you plan on coming up with five thousand dollars by tomorrow?” Boom asked as he sparked a blunt and passed it to Rico.

“I don’t know, man,” Rico sighed. “Hopefully Rashaad give a nigga a lil’ more time to come up with something.”

“Rashaad? West Garfield Park Rashaad?”

“Yeah. That's Shonnie's cousin. Don’t tell me you fucking him too.”

“Shit, I tried,” Boom said happily. “But he ain’t like the rest of you DL niggas. That nigga almost killed me for even looking at him the wrong way.”

While Boom drove aimlessly, Rico thought about the term “DL” and felt guilty. He saw Shonnie’s face in his head and started to wonder what would happen if she found out about his night time rendezvous. He knew how much niggas in the hood hated gay men, DL men, or any other man with feminie traits, and he didn’t want to become a target or to be laughed at.

“Yo, drop me off at the club,” he said, not wanting to feel that guilty feeling any longer. “I’ma go ahead and call it a night.”

“What?” Boom frowned. “I thought we was kicking it tonight.”

“Not no more. I can’t keep doing this shit to Shonnie.”

One thing Boom hated was getting all hot and bothered, only for Rico to change his mind and go back home to Shonnie. Granted, they weren’t a couple, but Boom did a lot for Rico—picking him up whenever and from wherever he wanted, giving him money, buying him shoes, clothes, and weed. And at the end of the day, Rico treated him like nothing more than a quick fuck.

“Well, since that's how you feel, make sure this your last night calling me for shit,” Boom said. “And I mean that. Don’t call me for a ride, weed, when she kicks your ass out again or nothing! I ain’t playing second best to no bitch.”

“Man, chill the fuck out,” Rico said.

Before he knew it, Boom whipped a u-turn in the middle of the street and sped toward the strip club where Shonnie worked. He had the urge to walk inside and tell her exactly what Rico had been up to when she had her back turned, but Rico warned him that if he ever said anything to anybody, his body would be nothing but bones before the cops even knew he was missing.

Shonnie had no idea Rico was coming that night. He didn’t call, text, or tell any of the girls to let her know he would be there. Besides, she was too busy keeping Vince happy to check her phone and since she knew Rico didn’t have Rashaad’s money, she wanted to dance as much out of Vince as she could to buy him some time. The problem was, Vince was on one that night, and he wasn’t feeling the thought of her going home with another man.

“You know you need to leave that nigga alone, right?” he said. “If you was my woman, ain’t no fucking way you’d be dancing in this nasty ass club.”

“Why we always gotta talk about Rico?” she asked, grinding her fat ass on the swollen lump in his pants while he fondled her titties.

“Becasue, I don’t like how that nigga handling you. You deserve better than this shit.”

“It’s not for you to like, Vince. I’m the one dating him.”

She kept her tone light and fun so he didn’t get offended and walk out without tipping her more than the minimum.

“I’m just saying. You too damn fine to be working here with all these thirsty ass niggas. I know you make more money than any bitch coming or going, but you could be doing so much better.”

Sometimes, Shonnie liked talking to Vince about her life's choices and how much better she could’ve been doing. It fed her confidence and gave her that extra push she needed to stay focused on getting out of Chicago’s night life. She hated how much shit he talked about Rico, but at some point she realized it was the truth she needed to hear if she was serious about wanting a better life.

“I appreciate you, Vince,” she said, straddling him on the leather couch in her private show room. “You always give me good advice.”

“I appreciate you too, Shonnie,” he gripped both her ass cheeks in his large hands. “One of these days, you should let me show you how much.”

Shonnie ignored him and continued grinding on his hardening wood. She couldn’t front like it didn’t feel good rubbing against her clit. Since she hadn’t had sex with Rico in a few weeks because she caught him cheating again and didn’t trust that he was clean, she walked around horny as fuck, craving to be touched by something other than her Rose.

The feeling of Vince’s hands cradling her ass and his lips slightly brushing across her nipples heightened the sexual tension between them. She grinded harder to the beat playing in the background, and he pressed upward just enough to add more friction to her pleasure.

Her breathing got heavier and her nipples got harder each time he touched them, until eventually, he slipped one into his mouth and let his tongue slither across it like a snake.

“Ahh shit,” Shonnie moaned and leaned into him, feeling herself about to explode. “Stop,” she whispered but kept grinding. “We can’t do this.”

“Why you still humping me then?”

Shonnie was so caught up in ecstacy, she kept going and going, until she could no longer contain herself. When Vince’s hand crept up to grab her by the throat, the feeling of being his prey sent her into overdrive. She let her head fall back and got lost in the moment until finally, her pussy dripped its milk all over the front of his pants.

“Shit,” she panted while trying to catch her breath. “Why the hell did you let me do that?”

“You wanted to do it,” he laughed. “Seems like you needed it to me.”

She eased off and sat next to him on the couch with her head resting on his shoulder. She was satisfied—sad about her relationship with Rico, but her pussy felt good, and in that moment, the possibility of something greater was all she wanted to think about.

“I wanna give you something,” Vince said. “I know I’m always here to get my rocks off and you always taking care of a nigga, but I don’t want you to feel like that’s all you are for me.”

“I don’t feel like that,” Shonnie replied. “You a lil’ tough sometimes, but I know deep down you got a good heart, so it don’t bother me.”

“Good.” He nodded and pulled a large wad of cash from his pocket. “This ‘bout three G’s right here. I’ma stop by tomorrow and drop off some more. It should be enough for you to get out of here and set yourself up somewhere nice. And I hope you do right by that shit, Shonnie. You deserve to have a life outside of Chicago.”

Shonnie took the money and held it close. Even though three G’s was nowhere near close to her max on a good night, The fact that Vince said he was giving her money to leave Chicago made it feel like it was. Her dream was to always leave the place that chewed both of her parents and spit them out into graves, she just never knew how she would survive outside of it.

“Thank you, Vince. You always looking out for me. Ever since my parents died, I feel so lost, and you always show up to remind me to keep grinding.”

“You ain’t lost,” Vince said sternly as he stood to leave. “You know what you gotta do. Now all you gotta do is do it.”